kristina100000:

you are the bisexual diva of this slovenian village..

inneskeeper:

got fired from work because i ended up becoming a great big doglike beast but they considered that a no-call no-show

digitaldiscipline:

raytoroapologist:

sanguinifex:

sexygaywizard:

raytoroapologist:

“i love music i wish i could hold it” well you can it’s called a CD and it’s got a hole and everything

TONIGHT WE FUCK MUSIC!!!

My man you may not want to announce you can fit through that small a hole

y ou are all so jealous of my thin meat

something CD fucker and the guy who invented prosciutto have both said

mrsterlingeverything:

anjew-jackson:

I think its great that so many people are getting history lessons like this

perditionsflames:

manywinged:

manywinged:

wore my thigh high boots on a walk today and we had to take a path through some long grass and while everyone else was rolling their pants into their socks and putting on jackets to protect themselves from ticks i was standing there smug as hell in my thigh high leather boots.

a hoe never gets lyme disease

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pochowek:

wikilifeadvice:

make your own foot scrub

  1. feet are pretty hard to make
  2. dont call me a scrub ever again

zombies-aliens:

riben:

owlservice:

I could be the person writing one time verification codes. 873726. 290971. 041452. 667656. It comes naturally to me.

They look so good

You have the best verification codes

froody:

“can you explain this gap in your employment history” I hiked the Appalachian Trail 8 times real fast. Then I got attacked by a bear in Maine and was in a coma for 6 months. I’m all good now. Taught me about adversity.

rocket-pancham:

demilypyro:

Does the schrodinger’s box experiment account for the fact that a cat in a box is most likely gonna yowl its lungs out

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